i had to write this down somewhere, so i will remember it for years. if nothing else, for the days to come when student teaching is kicking my ass and the little ones are dripping snot all over my clothes.
friday 2/1 was my last day of work until student teaching is over with, and i knew it was going to be a hard day. the whole week had been hard already. i actually didn't want the week to end and friday to come, for once. i was coming in early since housesitting is screwing up my commute routine, and one of my bosses had been out with sick kids for 5 days. she'd called on thursday planning to come in friday for my last day, but you never know with kids and strep throat and ear infections...
i was sitting at my desk reading my student teaching manual when both bosses came in and gave me a basket FULL of kleenex packs, hand sanitizer, zinc lozenges, emergen-c packets, stickers, notebook and pens, etc. basically a bunch of goodies for when i have to go be around little germy kids and am trying to stay healthy while working/learning. i almost started crying right then and there, but it was going to be a looooooong day if that happened! one of my co-paras, whom i've known for a few years but haven't worked as closely with compared to the others, came in with a scone and a print of a quote that referred to faith being taking one step further, and a hug. aww! i'm not super-religious but it's going to remind me that each day of student teaching is one step closer to being done with school and back at kayhi.
during 1st period, most of our study hall kids were out or late, but one that i've been working with somewhat closely this year brought me a box of valentine chocolates. awww!! 2nd period, one of my girls made lemon bars for the class to "celebrate", and we griped about me having to go to a different school for 3 months. 3rd and 4th were pretty typical days, with a few more sarcastic comments flung back and forth with one my students in 4th to make up for the days i'll be missing. i did come back to my desk after 3rd and found a beautiful note from one of my favorite students that again alomst had me in tears. how can i leave these kids that i've grown to love over the past 3 1/2 years?!?
5th was pretty quiet, as i didn't go help in the math class like normal since they were just working on the computers. 6th started off normal, as i worked across the hall with another favorite student. about 1/2 way through the period, one of my bosses called me over with an "emergency" from another studnet i've worked very closely with all year...it was entirely plausible, since he's been acting differently all week, like he did the week before xmas break (some kids don't like having vacations from school because home lives aren't great and school is a safe, routine place to be). however, as i walk through the door and see some students from other class periods, and cake, i knew the gig was up! one of the 5th period girls had asked me days before what my favorite cake was, and sure enough there was a pan of carrot cake with cream cheese frosting on the table, next to a pan of vanilla cake and frosting.
they all sang me "for she's a jolly good fellow" before several students spoke in front of the group about why they'll miss me. a few of them mentioned how much i've helped them with math and science, but the one with the alleged "emergency" put it best - "i got nothing to say." ohhhhh how i'll miss those buggers! i hope they know how much. several more hugs, and then it was the end of the day. one of my 4th period kids, another favorite, quickly came in, dropped a note on my desk saying how she'll miss me, and quickly turned around so she wouldn't cry.
it was hard to sit there at the end of the day, with no kids, and thinking about what was going to be coming on monday. i've been sitting at that same desk for 3 1/2 years now, with rare sick days, so i'm always at work. monday, i won't be. i'll be running around houghtaling, being introduced to the new principal that no one seems to care for, immediately sitting in on placement and IEP meetings, in a crazy, busy, chaotic, environment with a SPED teacher who has the personality of an energizer bunny. i, on the other hand, like calm, quietness, and routine. my bosses and coworkers have always strived for tranquility and peace, even if we're the only ones who demonstrate it.
i walked out of work that afternoon with one of my bosses; she said to keep my key because they don't know who will be replacing me while i'm gone and would rather me keep it than some stranger they don't really know. yay! i have a home to come back to! i need to clean off my desk a bit this weekend so it's ready (and make them feel guilty for "kicking me out of the nest"), but i know there will be days when the elementary schools are off but the high school isn't, so i can stop by and say hi to everyone. it was definitely a reality check when i went from work to the pool for swim practice (after stopping by to get creamsicles, only to find they had no orange juice, so i had to get vanilla italian sodas - ehh), and for those kids, it was just another normal day. with the addition of 16 petersburg swimmers who came down for the time trial, but still. definitely didn't leave me any room for reminiscing on the day or tearing up due to all the love and support shown. your ego gets built up a bit, then knocked right back down again!
the funny thing is, after all this time and my schooling finally culminating with student teaching, this is definitely not the path i thought i would ever be following. after pacific, i figured i'd be a physical therapist. when i didn't get into school right away (i sooooo half-assed those apps, not going to lie), and ended up hating the PT aide/receptionist job i had, the path was unknown. i came home, intending the move to be temporary, until i could save up some money and figure out what i wanted to do next. i never ever once thought i'd end up LOVING working with high school kids, much less teaching. case in point: graduation day at pacific. my parents meet one of my ExSci profs, who proceeds to tell them that, after 4 years of classes, i never once spoke in class. the same can be said for high school. high school is the starting point for when most people start to figure out who they are, and i think going back to high school (in a way) and giving it another shot helped me do that too - what i want, where i belong, what i'm meant to do. maybe that's reading into things waaaaay too much, but it helps me explain why i've ended up in a field that i almost vehemently refused to go into years ago.
monday morning is arriving waaay too fast. ready or not, here i go...
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