verboten

i got kicked out of practice this week.

well, not quite like that...but essentially.  or atleast it feels like that.  and i don't like it.  not one bit.

the background story is, i cover swim practices while chad's out of town on meets.  which is fine usually; it's more hours on deck but it means a bigger paycheck & usually the kids aren't super obnoxious.  if they are, i leave a note & let him know to deal w/ them when he gets back (it's a good cop/bad cop type of deal - you can guess which one i am).  the past 2 week/ends i've had to coach as he's taken kids up to anchorage and juneau, which meant 11 hrs on deck over 5 days/wk instead of just under 4 hrs over 3 days.  it's a big jump but i don't mind it so much. 

the latest weekend was a bit rough, however - one of my bosses is out with appendicitis/pneumonia/blood poisoning and won't be back for several more weeks.  they found a substitute, but he already had plans for a long weekend on nearby island so we were essentially short-staffed for 2 days.  and on top of that, one day my OTHER boss had to take the afternoon off (our busiest time) to take care of her sick daughter.  no sub on that day.  in essence, what happens, is that i feel like i'm the one left in charge even though we had a sub who'd worked in the class before & my coworker knows the ropes.  i may be "good cop" at the pool, but i'm definitely "bad cop" in the classroom.  things went fine, but it was a stressful couple of days.

on top of that, my current grad class (ESL) is ridiculous and i'm having issues getting practicum hours.  but that's a whole 'nother rant in itself.

i made it through the weekend, got through monday when BOTH bosses were out (2 subs to cover & a coworker, but again was the only one actually trying to get kids to work instead of letting them have free reign).  went home to work on schoolwork, thinking i'm home-free after a hellish day that had everything go wrong that it could have...except, the day wasn't over yet!

i got a call from the other ass't coach that she had a housesitting meeting and asked me to cover her squad.  oh sure, why not.  i hadn't seen/talked w/ chad much in the past 2 wks, might as well hear how the meets went and let him release his complaints a day earlier than normal.  i showed up and, being exhausted from work, was apparently grumpy.  so was he, after the meet.  apparently i was enough of a bitch (not really, just came across that way) that he kept asking if i was going to quit coaching while he walked out & headed home early to get some sleep.  well, keep pushing the issue, and i might, damnit!

practice went fine, but as soon as it was over i got a big long text about how as the "boss," he was making me take the rest of the week off from coaching.  while i appreciated the offer, i just needed to sleep & have a normal day at work and declined, but he was VERY persistent.  like genuinely concerned that i was going to burn out like last year's fiasco, or quit coaching.  he even said "please" and asked me to do it as a favor -- anyone that is around him for 5 min, knows this is very, very, very unusual behavior coming from him. 

i guess i gave in, but today was my first day "off" of the week.  i'm not going to lie, it threw off my whole routine this afternoon.  i didn't know what to do.  definitely didn't accomplish any homework like i should have...more like facebook prowling & pinterest browsing for 3 hrs instead of my usual 1 hr after work.  i went to master's practice since that's my usual stress relief, and he said that monday was the first time since he moved here in august that he saw me mad.  not that i was mad yesterday, more like stressed and tired, but he apparently was afraid i was going to punch him out when he left early. 

i didn't feel like i was angry at all, so i hate to see what he thinks if that ever happens, but he kept teasing me about being forced to take time off for the rest of practice - i literally feel like the bad kid who gets expelled from school!  that it bothers me that much just gives him fodder, so i was actually getting annoyed during practice - i think it's his goal in life to really piss me off just to see what happens.  which makes me have to work even harder to keep it under control. 

i've got 2 days left of not being on deck before i can go back to the "normal routine," whatever that may.  the spring is a crazy time period, no matter what.  i know i should appreciate his looking out for me (even if it's somewhat selfish, so he doesn't have to deal w/ a burnt-out coach or have to find a new one), and i'm trying really hard to remember that - every time i take that perspective, my heart melts a little more.  whatever happens this week, i got him to take me up on drinks this weekend - that's a step in the right direction, anyways! ;)